Here are six adorable Bat Mitzvah gifts to consider before just giving up and writing a check for $36 to the newly minted young adult in your life.

Modern Shabbat Candlesticks

What better way to encourage her to celebrate the Sabbath than with some ultra-contemporary candlesticks that she’ll want to keep on her table always. You have to pay for shipping though. And they might not come until after her ceremony. And $36 could go a long way towards her college fund!

Colorful Hamsa Necklace

Help her get to know her mystical side with a quirky hamsa necklace. Or she could choose how she wants to get to know her mystical side with a handy check you write in the car before walking into her party. It’s impossible to know what color necklace she would want anyway.

A Copy of The Red Tent

What better way to welcome her into womanhood than with a sacred feminist text? This gift is especially meaningful if she has already hit menarche. Although if you’re not sure if she’s begun menstruating and don’t want to overstep, she could probably just buy her own book with $36.

Ceramic Tzedakah Box

Teach her the importance of giving with her own decorative tzedakah box. Hopefully it won’t just sit on her dresser for the next seven years with sixty-eight cents in it, but just in case, maybe consider just writing a check instead? Maybe she’ll pass it on to the charity of her choice, and then you’ve fulfilled your own commandment to give!

Star of David Earrings

Give a classic piece of jewelry she can wear every Friday night. Whoa, some of these earrings are actually way more expensive than I expected. Does she even have her ears pierced? Maybe just go with the check.

A Jewish Cookbook

Inspire her to recreate her favorite recipes with a cookbook containing the classics. Just make sure she knows you’re not reinforcing gender roles by encouraging her to cook.

You know what? Go with the money instead. That way she can get whatever she wants. And isn’t feminism about expanding options beyond what we’re given?