Few could have predicted the plague that swept the world in 2020. With the promise of the 59th US presidential election, I had expected the year to bring hope and change for the better. Nonetheless, the COVID-19 pandemic quickly shut down all usual operations of life and any hope for a brighter year.  

Halfway through my formative seventh grade school year, I heard murmurs about a mysterious virus. Headlines on my newly acquired iPhone alerted me to an illness that seemed to be quickly traveling across the world. I apprehensively crossed my fingers and swiped the articles away, oblivious to the fact that my life would be put on pause for the next two years. At the time, I had more pressing matters to worry about: it was bat mitzvah season.  

Seventh grade brought many new challenges: my friendships were changing, my homework was more time-consuming, and I had a bat mitzvah to study for. I ignored any notion that a virus may soon sweep the nation as I focused on memorizing my Torah portion.  

During the first week of March 2020, I flew out to Los Angeles for the bat mitzvah of an old friend. We ate challah and danced as I tried my best to block out our parents’ hushed whispers about COVID cases in the US. Just a few days later, school was canceled for two weeks. I could no longer ignore the impending isolation that was slowly wrapping its hands around my life. Reality truly set in when I attended my very first Zoom event: a bat mitzvah on March 14, 2020. I logged on to the unfamiliar platform and joined my first of what became many virtual gatherings. What was intended to be a social and spiritual celebration of adulthood became a pixelated forum, underscored with anxiety over an unknown future.  

After that initial Zoom bat mitzvah, it became clear that my own celebration would look the same. Two weeks of canceled school turned into four, then six, until it was finally canceled indefinitely. As May 9—my bat mitzvah date—approached, my parents sat me down to discuss. I was given two options: proceed with the 9th on Zoom or delay my bat mitzvah. The idea of a Zoom bat mitzvah tarnished my vision of leading a busy Saturday morning service like I’d seen so many of my friends do. Without hesitation, I chose to delay; I couldn’t fathom the idea of a bat mitzvah celebration that lacked the presence of my family and friends. My date was pushed back numerous times as I continued to insist upon an in-person event. Finally, on May 29, 2021, I became bat mitzvah.  

While my service was held at a limited capacity and guests were required to wear masks, I got the in-person experience that I cared so deeply about. Even though I delayed a whole year, until I was 14, just to avoid a Zoom service, this experience cemented the care I have for my community. I didn’t grow up particularly religious, but my family joined a temple in search of a strong community after moving to Massachusetts. Luckily, I found community in both my temple and the larger Jewish community that it introduced me to. Early mornings at Hebrew school taught me our universal chants and prayers that I now sing with Jewish friends. I marvel at how I can connect to people through sacred phrases we’ve all been singing since childhood; a gift I received from joining a temple. Judaism has become, for myself, a way I can share meaningful experiences with others. Naturally, it felt obligatory for me to have my family and friends by my side as I partook in an iconic Jewish ritual.  

I believe this longing for community is both universally human and particularly Jewish. As humans, we look for others who we can relate to, who will support and guide us through all moments of life. As Jews, members of a religion that instructs us to congregate, community is deeply rooted in who we are. Even as a less religious Jew, I continuously feel uplifted and connected when in Jewish spaces. Through my turbulent bat mitzvah journey, I realized how connection and togetherness are central to Judaism, as well as my own values.  

Today, as many of my daunting college applications urge me to write about different communities that I’m a member of, I think back to my bat mitzvah experience. Recognizing my passion for togetherness has given me the confidence to join numerous Jewish and secular communities, where I can bond with others over shared interests and goals. As I move into the coming years that feel especially uncertain, I know that I will always have these spaces to ground me.